Loneliness

Larger groups break up in conversation with around 4 people. 4 is the magical number. I’m number 5. I’m too old to understand the jokes of my kids. I don’t get K-pop and don’t care about Harry Potter. I don’t have crushes on movie starts. From the sideline I listen to their conversation. Happy that they are sharing and talking with each other. Later I’ll sit on the couch, alone, reading a book to finally go to bed. Wondering - as I did o many times before- why I sleep in a double bed. Don’t need that much space.

Single parent loneliness doesn’t hit you at Christmas or for birthdays. It hits you when you do the mundane everyday stuff.